Counselling Services Available

Couples Counselling

Because your relationship is unique, no book or course is likely to give you all the answers.
  • Couples therapy with Jeff provides you with the support, insight, information and advice that is invaluable from an experienced counsellor.

  • With almost thirty years of working with couples, not to mention the personal experience of being married and a step-parent, Jeff brings a wealth of knowledge and insight into couples work.

  • Jeff's style is to follow the model of Emotionally Focused Therapy which has a very precise approach to getting your relationship back on track. This well researched model works well for everything from arguments to affairs.

  • You will understand, both through explanation and experiential work, how relationships come unstuck, and the steps that must be taken to address this situation. The way ahead will be clearly described to you.

  • You will be offered reading material and skills you can practice at home to help bring healing, connection, caring and love back into your relationship.I have written a book, "Succeassful Couples" which will give you supportive reading to do that will back up what is discussed and processed in therapy.

    Adolescent Counselling

    Adolescent counselling is a very specialist area that requires an appreciation of the developmental challenges that face young people today.
  • With over a decade of counselling young people as a school guidance counsellor, many years working with adolescents in private practice, and still supervising school counsellors, Jeff Saunders has the training and experience required to work with all of the issues facing your people.

  • Having raised his own stepchildren, Jeff knows the challenges of parenting, step-parenting , and the difficulties young people can face when having to confront situations forced on them due to the decisions of adults. He has worked with many young people and their parents or step-parents so as to restore harmony in disrupted and stressed lives.

  • Jeff often works with whole families, so as to address the distress that can occur within the family when children, teenagers and their parents are struggling to cooperate harmoniously.

    The courses listed below are not currently being offered. This may change during 2017.

    Spiritual Relationship Mastery courses, 101 and 102

    For over two decades, Jeff has been teaching relationship courses of one sort or another to members of the public, institutions, and special groups such as men's groups.

    These courses are ongoing, and there is usually a course happening or about to happen. Call Jeff and find out what is on offer. There is no requirement for course participants to be receiving couples counselling from Jeff. These courses are open to all members of the public, and the course below is the next on offer. A booklet is provided with each course.

    Managing Conflict, SRM 101

    Programme Outline


    Why bother with a relationship course? How can this course help you?

    Session 1: The Origins of Conflict.

    Why do I fight, argue with, feel differently about, the person I love?

    Session 2: Our Desire to Meet our Match.

    What attracted me to this person anyway? How do we keep loving each other?

    Session 3: The Love Triangle.

    How can I make my relationship work, and hold on to love?

    Session 4: Understanding emotion.

    How can we know exactly what to do when we next disagree?

    Session 5: Attachment needs.

    How does your past affect your present conflicts?

    Session 6: Relationship needs.

    Did you know there was a third being in every relationship?

    Session 7: Steps to Managing Conflict.

    How can we prepare for, and possibly avoid, our next conflict?

    Session 8: Compassionate Conflict Communication.

    How can we know exactly what to do when we next disagree?

    Session 9: Compassionate Conflict Communication in practice.

    How can we melt down and still survive the heat?

    Skills of Partnership, SRM 102

    Programme Outline


    Why bother with a relationship course? How can this course help you?

    Session 1: The Gift of Paying Attention.

    How could I listen better, rather than react?

    Session 2: Detecting and understanding your projections.

    Why are my buttons being pushed, and my behaviour getting ugly?

    Session 3: Understanding your projections.

    Can we ever stop our reactive cycles?

    Session 4: We must understand our reactive cycle.

    What is our reactive pattern?

    Session 5: Our inner world fuels our projections.

    What must we do to stop the same old same old?

    Session 6: Recognizing and honouring difference.

    What can I do when differences arise?

    Session 7: Understanding, supporting, empowering yourself.

    Can I accept that I might not be good enough?

    Session 8: Compassionate Conflict Communication.

    Why should I talk when I’m in a mood?

    Session 9: Effective use of 'I' Statements.

    How do we talk without further inflaming the problem?

    Session 10: Prioritizing the needs of relationship.

    What can we do to bring quality to further enhance our love?

Individual Counselling

Jeff Saunders also has two decades of experience in counselling and life-coaching common concerns facing people
  • Depression and anxiety counselling in Christchurch is an important service Jeff Saunders provides.

    Extremely disturbing for people are the scourges of depression and anxiety, brought about by modern day stresses. Ways to address these are covered in The 12 Choices of Winners (see Books), but one to one work is the speediest way to manage these demons.

  • Low self-esteem and poor self-identity can lead to a raft of disturbing experiences

    Other common concerns include anger, loneliness, low self-esteem, and various emotional upsets. Self-identity and career direction difficulties are also commonplace in a society that doesn't train people to know, let alone honour, who they are and follow their dreams.

  • Teenage behaviours can be of concern to parents

    Teenage behaviours can be confusing and hard work for parents. Becoming an autonomous individual while still relating to, and being dependent on, family is not easy for many teens.

  • Spiritual health and mental health can be closely connected

    Seeking a new or more certain spiritual direction can be difficult in a society that tends to focus on religious norms, especially if there is little or no support from others. Mental health and one's sense of self can be affected by this. However, connecting with one's own spirituality can be a distressing or confusing process, which I personally experience as an ongoing process..

  • Men's health and wellbeing has been a passion of Jeff's for over two decades

    Men's issues can be unique to men, and many couples present with little understanding of the gender issues that arise in relationship. Men's personal crises are often different to women's, and these can be challenging for men to discuss with women. Many years of working with men and men's groups has raised my awareness to the myriad of concerns that men face.

  • Parenting and step-parenting - the big stresses

    Step-parenting and even ordinary parenting challenges are some of the most stressful issues couples ever deal with. My personal experience is that step-parenting can be hard, unappreciated, stressful and emotionally taxing. My professional experience tells me that many others have experienced step-parenting as similarly demanding.

Spiritual Life Mastery courses, 101 and 102

If you want your relationship to be the best, then you have to be the best also. The quality of any relationship is a reflection of the participants. The degree to which participants have yet to sort out their life, is the degree to which the relationship reflects this.

So - if you want to ensure that you can manage your emotions well, react less, be more loving, have clear and appropriate boundaries, take this course which gives you insight into how you function. Spiritual Life Mastery courses are essentially all about personal development, and will assist you to become clearer about who you are, who you're not, what you want from life, and importantly, how to get childhood conditioning off your back.

SLM 102 is a course supported by the The 12 Choices of Winners (see Books) and participants will use this as a resource during the course. This course will next be offered in the Spring of 2011.

The Art of Living, SLM 101

Programme Outline

Introduction: Course Outline.

What needs changing and why?

Session 1: What do we need to change and why? Let’s begin with your feelings

Session 2: How can we usefully use emotion, and not be ruled by it?

Session 3: Create your world with emotion and constructive thinking.

Session 4: What are the origins of, and solutions to, unhelpful thinking?

Session 5: How does polarized thinking impact on your life?

Session 6: How did you get to think that right/wrong were fixed realities?

Session 7: Whose mind operates yours anyway?

Session 8: Why be so attached, when it brings you pain?

Session 9: Bringing peace and harmony to self through non-attachment.

Session 10: Love yourself so you’ll love your life.

The Choices of Winners, SLM102

Programme Outline

Introduction: Course Outline.

What needs changing and why?

Session 1: Understanding the nature of power, and how to use your power.

Session 2: How intentions and responsibility set your life course.

Session 3: Being proactive and adopting self-disciplines to support your intentions.

Session 4: The pivotal role of mental balance and self-management.

Session 5: Constructively using feelings for balance and guidance.

Session 6: Knowing and prioritizing who you are and what you need and value.

Session 7: Creating your own beliefs, values and life direction.

Session 8: Healing old emotional wounds and mindsets and moving on.

Session 9: Developing non-judgmental self acceptance and self-care.

Session 10:Manifesting your own dreams and creating your chosen reality.